Pretty funny little virus story on The Register about a worm called "Amus"
Now, worms and viruses aren't funny at all - however this one has a twist. It uses the Microsoft Speech Engine which is built into Windows XP to talk to it's victims.
In case you're "clickaphobic" (or are just plain lazy) and don't want to click on the Register article link here's what the virus says:
How are you. I am back. My name is mister hamsi. I am seeing you. Haaaaaaaa. You must come to turkiye. I am cleaning your computer. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. 0. Gule. Gule.
...which I'm sure leaves you all much more enlightened.